November 28, 2011
Spouses face great suffering when they discover their inability to conceive a child. Even with measures such as natural family planning or fertility drugs, not every married couple is able to have children through natural means. In vitro fertilization (IVF) has become a commonplace method for helping married couples overcome infertility. The IVF process involves the combining of sperm and egg in a laboratory Petri dish before implanting one or more embryos into the womb. Many married couples are unaware of any moral objections to in vitro fertilization and view it as a wonderful technological breakthrough for overcoming infertility. While it is understandable that spouses facing infertility would desire all possible means to alleviate their suffering and welcome a child into the world, such thinking indicates an improper understanding of both God’s design for conjugal love and the importance of suffering for the sake of the truth.
God has ordained sexual intercourse as a means for spouses to express their love through a complete gift of self. The intense bond that a husband and wife share through sexual intercourse is meant to unite the spouses and strengthen their relationship, and the love between them can also be fruitful in the conception of a child. The Catholic Church speaks against in vitro fertilization because the procedure violates God’s design of conjugal love as a simultaneously unitive and procreative act between spouses (for additional objections to IVF that concern the creation and destruction of multiple embryos, see Arland K. Nichols’ recent article “In Vitro Fertilization is De-Humanizing”).
Spouses who utilize IVF are foregoing the unity that comes with the complete gift of self during the marital act. The spouses are using their reproductive organs not to achieve unity through a total commitment of love, but they instead are using them as mere instruments in the creation of a child. Spouses using IVF are also not accepting procreation as a potential result of self-gift within sexual intercourse, but instead they are treating procreation as a right that is separate from any connection with love. Such an outlook, even if not understood as such by a married couple, views children as products that one should be able to demand from God. The Church has consistently taught, however, that a married couple only has a right to sexual intercourse within marriage, not a right to conceiving a child. Children are undeserved gifts from God, stemming from the spouses’ expression of mutual love.
Married couples dealing with infertility need to understand the importance of suffering if they want to uphold the plan of God for conjugal love and avoid methods such as in vitro fertilization. Jesus’ death on the cross is the ultimate model for how we must place the will of God above our own will. His death and resurrection shows us that humility and sacrifice often involve immense suffering, but are always rewarded by God. Spouses’ ability or inability to conceive a child is part of God’s will for their life together. Discovering the will of God vis-à-vis their fertility can involve spouses seeking morally sound means such as those offered by NaPro Technology or fertility drugs, but staying committed to the truth about God’s plan for conjugal love means foregoing illicit procedures like in vitro fertilization.
Spouses who embrace the suffering that comes from infertility are imitating Christ’s obedience to the will of God and trust in His plan throughout every hardship. Even when the thing one desires is a great good, like the desire for a child, Christ shows us that true love requires the acceptance of suffering and the humbling of oneself to the will of God. In his encyclical Spe Salvi, Pope Benedict XVI notes how “even the ‘yes’ to love is a source of suffering, because love always requires expropriations of my ‘I,’ in which I allow myself to be pruned and wounded” (38).
While the Lord grants us blessings every day and will certainly give strength to married couples who suffer from infertility, it can be difficult for spouses to see how their suffering will be rewarded by God. During such difficult moments the couple can draw strength from recalling that heaven is our ultimate reward for following Jesus every day on the road to Calvary. Jesus’ suffering and death not only display God’s great love for humanity but also demonstrate God’s desire for humanity to live the truth in every circumstance. As Pope Benedict XVI remarks, the “capacity to suffer for the sake of the truth is the measure of humanity” (Spe Salvi, 39). Let us pray that all married couples facing the burden of infertility will grow in humility and love by uniting their suffering with Christ’s passion, expressing confidently the knowledge that the cross leads to the resurrection.
Brendan Dudley is a Contributing Writer of HLI America. He writes for the Truth and Charity Forum.
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Tagged: http://rustbeltphilosophy.blogspot.com/2011/11/when-youre-headed-to-grave-you-dont.html
[...] IVF, Suffering, and God’s Will – Brendan Dudley, HLI America [...]
I left a comment on Eli’s blog, but it really addresses this post.
Australia was one of the leaders in the field of IVF at one stage, though I know the procedure was pioneered in the UK.
There has been a debate about whether lesbians should be allowed access to it, and recently a TV show called Crownies, had a DPP (Department of Public Prosecutions) prosecutor pregnant in a lesbian relationship. In fact, the final episode screened last night had her give birth to twins (this is all fiction of course).
What makes me angry about this is how the Catholic Church still wants to dictate what people do in their bedrooms. The Catholic Church is obsessed about sex in the most negative way possible. They are against contraception to prevent overpopulation, against condoms to prevent AIDS and against relationships between same sex couples. The Catholic Church is not only living in the Dark Ages they are one of the most dangerous influences to morality and the future of the planet.
Regards, Paul.